How to make the RIGHT Decision..

So why do bad things happen to good people? In a word – choices. If you search for answers to this difficult question in the media or on the Internet they will invariably mention God or philosophical views related to that which you cannot control. However, in life there are many things you CAN control, just by making the right choices.

Why do bad things happen to good people? Bad things don’t just happen to good people, they happen to every single one of us. Good things happen to us all too, but we tend not to remember those because we want them to happen all the time. It’s just that when bad things happen we tend to remember them for longer.

Many external factors which we can’t control, such as the weather or the economy, often shape our decisions for us. For example if the economy is pretty bad and finances are tight, maybe you’ll decide not to splash out on that holiday or that new car. Maybe you’ll decide to save money instead.

We just don’t realize that the reason bad things happen to us a lot of the time is because we make the wrong decisions. Making one wrong decision can quickly lead to a cataclysmic sequence of events which just get worse as you go along, whether it be daily, weekly, monthly or even longer term.

These are not bad decisions, they can be considered prudent and wise. Making decisions like these are not difficult as they can be considered common sense.

However, making the right decisions on a personal level will determine what you go through mentally on a daily basis and this IS something you are in control of because the only person in control of how you think is YOU. Your frame of mind is an essential determinant of how a particular decision will pan out when it’s made. If you make a decision when you’re annoyed, angry, upset, depressed or unhappy, the likelihood of that decision turning into a negative outcome increases significantly. On the contrary, if you make a decision when you’re relaxed, happy, optimistic and affirmative, you will be more likely to experience a positive outcome.

Many people just don’t realize what frame of mind they’re in when they’re making important decisions. Making a conscious effort to understand this concept will greatly improve the chances of you making the right decisions in life. Sometimes, making the wrong decision may cost you time, money, effort, missed opportunities, or all the above. Don’t worry about it, you will get other chances to make similar choices. Where it becomes really important is when your principles and character are at stake.

Don’t ever let a decision cost you your individuality. Don’t compromise on your values, principles, ethics and whatever makes you…you. The worst kind of decision you can make is the one which costs you something dear to you, something you love. To make the right decision you need to stop thinking. Instead you need to ‘feel’ the decision. Think of all your choices you have in a particular situation and explore how you feel about each one of them. Choose the one which makes you feel the best. If you practice this method with a clear mind, you will gain clarity and will be able to easily differentiate between the right and wrong choice.

You want to ensure everything is right before taking action

Look at your options objectively. Don’t make choices when you’re negatively emotional such as sad, angry, depressed, unhappy etc. You need to be either completely unemotional or positively emotional when you’re making a decision. Here’s why you often end up making the wrong choice:

Other people tell you it’s the wrong decision

This is encroaching on your individuality. Why would you let others decide how your life will turn out? It’s a sign that you don’t trust yourself and you’re unwilling to take responsibility for your own decisions. By letting others decide for you, you’re becoming what they are not what you are.

Not learning from the past

It’s easy to do something the same way again and again simply because that’s the way you’ve always done it, it’s second nature. Take a good look at the outcome. If things have repeatedly not gone in your favour, you need to make a different choice next time. Learn from failure.

Your want instant gratification

Making a particular choice may well get you what you want right now but what are the longer term consequences? Look at the bigger picture. Try to make choices that will put you in a better position permanently in the long term, rather than making a series of wrong choices for temporary gain in the short term.

You don’t like taking risks

Your decisions tend to be mostly rational and not spontaneous. Whilst this will reduce the probability of negative outcomes in some cases, you will never experience the unexpected outcomes associated with being impulsive. You will never know what ‘could have been’ if you’re always too sensible.

Everything will never be ‘just right.’ If you’re always waiting for the perfect conditions before you do something, you might be waiting a long time. Also known as procrastination. Don’t spend too long deciding. It’ll cost you time and lost opportunities.

And here’s how to start making better choices:

Use your experience

All the lessons you’ve learnt so far in life should equate to better decisions as you go forward. As you become more confident, your naivety should reduce as you become wiser and smarter.

Be better informed

Rather than make an ill-informed decision based on lack of information, ensure you know as much as possible about a situation before making a decision to take action. By knowing more, you might find yourself thinking differently.

Have belief in yourself

Other people may not agree with you, or may even put your ideas down. Learn to differentiate between listening to their opinion and changing yours because of them. Trust your instinct. Don’t be dissuaded based on the emotions of others.

Stick with it

Once you’ve made a decision, stick to it. If you change your mind you will just create more uncertainty and will begin to doubt yourself. Have courage in your convictions and discipline yourself to stick to the choice you make.

Think long term

Your aim is to have a good life, not just a good day or week. Making short term sacrifices for long term gain is always going to be better than a quick fix now. Thinking long term will expand your horizons and allow you to take a little longer to decide.

Remember, whatever decisions you make, make them with a sound mind. Your thoughts will ultimately become your actions and your actions will determine your circumstances.

Article Source: Vishal_C_Patel

positive energy in life..

Our thoughts are the doorway of our emotions. “I'm completely stuck in this” - if such thoughts crop up in your mind quite often, it's time to give a serious thought to the things going wrong. A possible reason can be the responsibility of playing of several roles in life.

I am feeling bad when my bro felt sad when I forgot his birthday hmmm ... it is happening with me all the time..even my frnds r forgiving me all the time when I forgot their bdays and their important days hmmm..
I am seriously thinking of changing this routine :D

Not only for me it happens with everyone one or the other way with busy routines..
Many times we experience insomnia, mood swings, emotional turmoil and uneasiness while carrying out various duties in our lives. This can further make you passive on many fronts in life.



We then lose all our positive energy and become the storehouse of negative energy.

Here are a few tips of regaining the lost positive energy in life:

Take Out Time for Yourself: Try and do a division of your heavy workload. Make a list of tasks which can be split into smaller chunks. If there are some tasks which you carry out regularly but at the back of your head you realise they aren't really important, give them up. Try and learn the art of time management. Make attempts to strike a balance between your personal and family life.

Bad Times would Eventually Go Away: Downbeat circumstances can become a cause of sorrow. But bear this in your mind that this time would eventually be over. Try and see if any benefits can be extracted from such harsh times. This would promote optimism in you.
Good Company: Try and avoid the company of people whose favourite pastime is exploring negativities in others. This can only aggravate your problem.

Think Positive: Don't let thoughts like: “I'm trapped”, “things are never going to change” etc. cloud your head. Easier said than done but you can at least give it a try.
At your Workplace: If you're finding it difficult to handle things in your office, do not hesitate in walking up to your boss and discussing things with him. These days many companies provide counseling to their employees.
Leisure Activities: Though clichéd but activites like watching movies, listening to music, gossiping, travelling can actually help you overcome negativities in your life.
Getaways: If you're stuck in the din and bustle of your city life, it's time to go for a nonchalant break. Plan getaways to hills, jungles, beaches et al (there's no point going to just another city for that would not help you escape from the usual uproar). You would feel rejuvenated and. Some personal experience here.
Eat Healthy: Eating healthy food is a key to not just remain physically fit but also to attain good mental health.I miss my mom food hmm ...

courtesy of yahoo :D

Unexpected Sadness..

New year carried Sadness earlier itself ..
My grand father died ...I was shocked to listen that news at first...Later I understood I left out with no choice other than to digest it ..

I started thinking about past ..the moments we share in the past...
My grandfather talks less so our conversations are countable from these many years..but we share silence as a emotion uncountable times..two decades of silence ended with this year death noise ...
In my early childhood once I felt y these old ppl in our house ..always restrict ours in one or the other..
I asked my dad .."Dad we will leave oldies(grand ma and grand father) alone.. I didnt like them much.."
He shocked at first n later he told in a soft tone " OK we will leave them alone ..chinna(my bro)'s wife also will do the same for US..is that fine for you? "
I was horrified for a thought like that even..
He understood my feelings and continued.."In my young age I used to be very naughty..old days ppl bring water from far places..your grandfather also bring water from far ..at tht time I asked him to carry me otherwise I used to cry..He cant leave me in a crying mood so he carries water n me ..think how difficult will be ? he should do that for every time and he did..how much patience required for that??"

After listening to my dad I felt bad n guilty...From then I started observing his acts unlike past..
n I loved him .....
I felt very sad after watching him dead ...Infact I cried...Crying won't make you less of a person.It's perfectly fine to cry over a lost love. It's the first stage of dealing with the situation.
losing someone and accepting it is one of the most challenging decisions that one will ever have to do. The aftermath is painful and is too hard to deal with. Acceptance is the last thing you have in mind for you can't believe that after everything you went through, after all the years you have been together, it still came to an end...
It is important to understand that going through denial is a natural part of the grieving process when a relationship ends..
Denial means very simply that you don't want to believe or acknowledge that what is happening is really happening.
It is definitely hard to move on, but you have no choice but to get over a relationship that ends suddenly....

tatayya I missed u...........Always noise ends not silence...you will always be there in my inner silent thoughts.........