New year carried Sadness earlier itself ..
My grand father died ...I was shocked to listen that news at first...Later I understood I left out with no choice other than to digest it ..
I started thinking about past ..the moments we share in the past...
My grandfather talks less so our conversations are countable from these many years..but we share silence as a emotion uncountable times..two decades of silence ended with this year death noise ...
In my early childhood once I felt y these old ppl in our house ..always restrict ours in one or the other..
I asked my dad .."Dad we will leave oldies(grand ma and grand father) alone.. I didnt like them much.."
He shocked at first n later he told in a soft tone " OK we will leave them alone ..chinna(my bro)'s wife also will do the same for US..is that fine for you? "
I was horrified for a thought like that even..
He understood my feelings and continued.."In my young age I used to be very naughty..old days ppl bring water from far places..your grandfather also bring water from far ..at tht time I asked him to carry me otherwise I used to cry..He cant leave me in a crying mood so he carries water n me ..think how difficult will be ? he should do that for every time and he did..how much patience required for that??"
After listening to my dad I felt bad n guilty...From then I started observing his acts unlike past..
n I loved him .....
I felt very sad after watching him dead ...Infact I cried...Crying won't make you less of a person.It's perfectly fine to cry over a lost love. It's the first stage of dealing with the situation.
losing someone and accepting it is one of the most challenging decisions that one will ever have to do. The aftermath is painful and is too hard to deal with. Acceptance is the last thing you have in mind for you can't believe that after everything you went through, after all the years you have been together, it still came to an end...
It is important to understand that going through denial is a natural part of the grieving process when a relationship ends..
Denial means very simply that you don't want to believe or acknowledge that what is happening is really happening.
It is definitely hard to move on, but you have no choice but to get over a relationship that ends suddenly....
tatayya I missed u...........Always noise ends not silence...you will always be there in my inner silent thoughts.........
